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A LOT HAS BEEN INCORRECTLY REPORTED ABOUT ALIEN ABDUCTIONS IN THE MEDIA AND IN MOVIES. THEY HAVE IT ALL WRONG!!  I KNOW, I AM A HAPPY ABDUCTEE.

THIS NONSENSE OF ALIENS NABBING YOU OUT OF YOUR BED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND PERFORMING WEIRD MEDICAL EXPERIMENTS ON YOUR PERSON ARE CRAP.   YES, THEY DO ":BEAM" YOU UP TO THEIR CRAFTS AND INSERT A "TRACKING" DEVICE INTO YOUR BODY, BUT IT ISNT A CAPSULE SHAPED IMPLANT MADE OUT OF SOME EXOTIC METAL, NOT ANYMORE ANYHOW. OVER TIME THE GREYS/GRAYS HAVE MADE LEAPS FORWARD IN IMPLANT TECHNOLOGY, GONE ARE THE CRUDE DAYS OF IMPLANTS VIA THE RECTUM (CIRCA 1947) AND HELLO THE NEW AND IMPROVED ORGANIC STRAND INPLANTS (VIA THE NOSE, SOMETIMES LEADING TO NOSE BLEEDS,, MINOR SIDE EFFECT..)  MINE IS IN MY NECK JUST BELOW MY CORTEX. I KNOW THIS BECAUSE I HAVE HAD IT SURGICALLY REMOVED TWICE. THE DUNCE DOCTORS CLAIM ITS JUST A LIPOMA THAT JUST HAPPENS TO RE-GROW AT THE SAME PLACE.

THESE GRAYS ARE A WILY BUNCH INDEED. MY ONLY GRIPE IS THAT WHEN I REMOVE IT, FOR COSMETIC PURPOSES THE KNUCKLEHEADS PUT IT BACK IN THE SAME PLACE! CANT THEY IMPLANT IT ELSEWHERE? I TAPE A MESSAGE TO THE BACK OF MY NECK AT NIGHT INSTRUCTING THE MORONS TO PUT IT ELSEWHERE, BUT THEY JUST DONT GET IT!

WHY WE ARE ABDUCTED IS THE REASON FOR MY CONSTANT REQUESTS TO BE TAKEN AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE. WE ARE NOT TAKEN FOR WEIRD TESTS AND IMPREGNATION, NOPE NOT AT ALL, WE ARE TAKEN AS A SORT OF INTERGALACTIC PORN STAR.

AFTERALL, LETS FACE IT, THE GRAYS ARE ONLY 4 FEET TALL AND DONT EXACTLY HAVE THE BIGGEST DICKS IN THE GALAXY. HENCE THE NEED FOR EARTHLINGS WHO HAVE QUESTIONABLE MORALS WHEN IT COMES TO SEX. WE WILL  F U C K ANYTHING WITH A HEARTBEAT!

WE ARE TAKEN TO PLEASURE THE GRAY FEMALES AND ARE THE COSMIC CHIPPENDALES AT THEIR LEISURE, AND FOR THEIR STRANGE PARTIES. EARTHLING FEMALES ARE TAKEN IN PAIRS AND IN THREES TO "ENTERTAIN" THE GRAY MALES IN WILD GIRL ON GIRL ACTION IN THEIR "CLUBS",  AT THE RISK OF SOUNDING RACIALLY STEREOTYPICAL, THE MALE GRAYS CLUBS ARE VERY SIMILAR TO ORIENTAL KARAOKE BARS.

THE GRAYS USUALLY ABDUCT THE RURAL/FARM FOLK DUE TO THE FACT THAT THEY ON AVERAGE HAVE THE LARGER TALLY WHACKERS ON EARTH.  I THINK IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE OPEN RANGES AND CLEARER AIR...    SO I AM VERY HONOURED AS A CITY BOY TO BE ABDUCTED FOR THEIR "PROGRAM".

SO NEXT TIME YOU FEEL YOU HAVE LOST A FEW HOURS THAT YOU CANNOT EXPLAIN, JUST SIT BACK AND LIGHT UP A SMOKE AND REVEL IN THE FACT THAT YOU ARE A COSMIC PORN STAR. THE ALIENS ARE MAKING USE OF YOU FOR YOUR ABILITY TO SHAG THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUT OF THEIR ALMOND EYED WIVES.  MAN AINT LIFE SWELL??????

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the other day i was at a shopping mall in alberton with my son kyle reece watching a puppet show put on for the kids in the main food court area.the show was silly but fun. the kids liked it. what got me was the sudden waft of hot freshly prepared falafels from the anat falafel franchise kiosk just behind me. man that smell was heavenly and immediately transported me back to a previous life where one saturday i was at the colloseum in rome with my then son maximillion silverius. we were just settling down on the third tier in our seats to watch the saturday matinee`. we had just bought our favourite food. falafels. the finest falafels this side of judea. bought from the franchise that was started in judea years earlier, after reaching fame as the venue for the biblical "last supper", CRAZY FAIZELS FABULOUS FALAFEL INN AND SPORTS BAR. man they were addictive. saturdays at the colloseum were special treats, the kids loved it. there is nothing quite like the sound of shrieks of delight  from the kids as the chariots whipped by chasing down the screaming christians. the chariot gladiators were super stars of their day ( like the michael schumachers and undertakers of today), all the kids wanted to grow up to be just like their heroes and also thunder around the arena riding over their christian victims. i miss those times, man they were the good old days,  crazy faizels fabulous falafels  and  the atmosphere of the tournaments. granted nowadays  the entertainment is a tad drab by comparison but the time spent with your son is great. so back to the puppet show in alberton and the anat falafels and i  revel in that great nostalgic feeling.

i do so miss my past lives.

www.michaelbdasilva.20m.com

this is a list of assassinations that rocked the world and led in many cases to the decline of society.

 sennacherib of assyria.

jesus of nazareth.

john the baptist.

 caligula (roman emperor)

 eric iv king of denmark.

 lord darnley, second husband of mary queen of scots.

 abraham lincoln.

 james . a garfield (US president).

 alexander ii king of russia.

sitting bull, chief of the sioux american indian tribe.

 william mckinley, (US president)

 grigori e rasputin.

 michael collins.

arch duke franz ferdinand.

 pancho villa.

 leon trotsky.

 reinhard heydrich.

 mahatma gandhi.

 patrice lumumba.

 john f kennedy.

ngo dinh diem, president of south vietnam.

malcolm x.

 hendrik verwoerd.

ernesto "che" guevara.

 martin luther king.

 robert f kennedy.

faisal, king of saudi arabia.

 jimmy hoffa.

steve biko.

 aldo moro, italian prime minister.

 lord mountbatten.

 park chung hee, president of south korea.

 john lennon.

 anwar sadat.

 indira gandhi.

 olof palme, swedish prime minister.

 rajiv gandhi.

 chris hani.

yitzhak rabin.

maurizio gucci.

 gianni versace.

humpty dumpty!

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this is a short true or false quiz.

give it a bash.

T OR F. the umbilical cord is part of a parachute?

T OR F. the pubic hair is a type of wild australian rabbit?

T OR F. a mons pubis is the small mound of soil found at the entrance of a burrow of the wild australian pubic hair?

T OR F. the fallopian tube is found in a t.v. set?

T OR F. genitalia is the name of italy`s official airline?

T OR F. the sphinctor is an architectural marvel found next to the pyramids at giza in egypt?

T OR F. moby dick is a type of venereal disease?

T OR F. gonnorreah is a world famous show jumping horse?

T OR F. coitus interruptus is a latin term used by roman catholic priests during an exorcism?

T OR F. the menstrual cycle has 3 wheels?

T OR F. a vulva is a motor car built in sweden?

T OR F. dildo is a term used to confirm a statement without repeating the statement? eg. i love you.. "dildo"

T OR F. consumate, is what a black widow does to her mate after procreation?

T OR F. genes were first patented by levi strauss in 1886?

T OR F. relative humidity is the sweat and heat that builds up around your balls when you have  s e x with your cousin?

T OR F. pumpkin, , , , is what hillbilly rednecks from alabama like to do? 
T OR F. david caruso`s characters name in the popular television  series CSI, is lieutenant   fellatio caine?                       
T OR F. dyslexia is caused as a result of brian damage?

T OR F. haemmeroids are huge asteroids threatening to crash into uranus?

T OR F. the islets of langerhans are a group of tourist islands off the coast of norway?

T OR F. asphyxia is the reconstructive plastic surgery performed on the buttocks?

T OR F. endoplasmic reticulum is a galaxy within our solar system?

T OR F. the clitoris is a small plant indigenous to the transvaal?

T OR F. a gay man with an erection is known by the genus name, homo erectus?

T OR F. lesbians is the collective term for women who live in lisbon portugal?

T OR F. jabberwocky, is the surname of chewbacca the wookie in the star wars movies? 

T OR F. gobbledeegook is a term first coined by an american seargent outside na trang during the vietnam war after witnessing a bengal    tiger eating the remains of a VC soldier?

T OR F. female oral contraception is spitting as opposed to swallowing?

T OR F. afterbirth...... the doctor slaps you?

T OR F. a big apple crumble is indeed osama bin laden`s favourite dessert?

T OR F. the archbishop of canterbury is known by the title" primate of all england"?

T OR F. the clerk of the closet in the u.k. is the sovereigns principle chaplain?

if you answered the last 2 question as true, you were indeed correct.

its strange that for a group that vehemently denies/ denounces and absolutely refuses to entertain the notion of evolution and that man evoluted from apes.then they go and call the arch a primate? funny thing that.   indeed?

a dude known as the clerk of the closet just screams gay guy keeping the register of all the queens  and queers stepping out of the "closet" ?